Enns on Ecclesiastes

Dr. Peter Enns was my New Testament professor during my first year of college. This year in chapel, he did a three part teaching on Ecclesiastes. The timing was perfect, because just this summer I found that this book is one of my favorites, but I was puzzled by it. Imagine my surprise when Enns, one of the professors to has taught me the most, and has taught me to think, the most, was going to speak into the book that I wanted so much to understand.
These are some of his words that I captured on paper.
_________________________________________________________________________
Week 1

Why have a job?
Meaningful life
Buy a house

What does all that matter? I'm gonna die anyway.
That's a summary of Ecclesiastes.

Enns loves this book. Because it's more honest about things than we sometimes dare to be.

Nothin matters. Everything is meaningless. No matter what all your efforts, you'll have nothing to show for it because you're gonna die. God is to blame because he set it up this way.
The authors wants this sour note.
Totally stupid. Everything is stupid.
What do we gain for our toil?
He's punching you between the eyes and grabbing you by the throat. He won't let you go. And don't write him off.
For him nature does not declare glory of God. He's having a bad day. Nature tells of the meaninglessness.
Nothing new. Don't hold on to anything because it's nothing new and nothing that will last.
Verse 11. People are not remembered after they die and this cycle won't end.
Don't find comfort too quickly.
Even family is quite forgotten! I [Anna] don't even know my paternal grandmother's name.
He wants you to be depressed and shift to this uncomfortable state.
Steve Jobs has affected a lot of us. Do we remember when he died?

Are you depressed yet? If yes, mission accomplished. And this is in the Bible. Where do you find honesty like this?
No wiggling out, no quick answer. He keeps you there for 12 chapters.
It might be surprising to learn what he says to get you out of this. 

Week 2

Maybe the Israelites didn’t always have it all together. 

Martin Luther- “Love Him? Sometimes I hate Him.”

Honesty that sometimes we don’t embrace.

We play church.

God understands.

We expect the wrong things when we read it.

This book is not telling us how we should think, it’s telling us how we do think sometimes.

It's a mirror and we look and see ourselves in it.

Ch 12 --> Cohelet is done talking and narrator will evaluate what he's been saying for 12 chapters

1. Cohelet is wise. You can't blow him off. 

2. Wisdom hurts. Not there to make you feel good.

Words of the wise are like goods, like firmly fixed nails.

Don't baptize your lack of organizational skills in a Bible verse. 

At the end, what do you do? 

Fear God. Keep the commandments.

It's dark, you want to give up, you don't want to be an Israelite. 

Solution?  It's not a quick fix. It's a path. Keep walking. Be and Israelite.

That was their solution.

I don't feel like it, it makes no sense -- it doesn't matter. Keep walking.

For the Israelites the "path forward" was being an Israelite anyway, even when they didn't want to.

Week 3

In a faith crisis. Absent in his life, he feels God is downright mean.
We all have cohelet moments. We are disappointed or angry when God is a no show.
What does it look like for us to keep going in these moments? What diff does it make? What diff does Jesus make?
These moments are part of our journey and communion with Christ.
Three things Enns has learned:
Whatever it is, be honest with God. We are conditioned to put on make up and pretend everything is ok for God.
Enns was a great father except for a 25 year period when he was just winging it. Hard to believe that his daughter went through a time when she didn't like him at all. What a blessing that she could be honest with him! She trusted him enough. Do I trust God enough? Do I trust his love enough to be in his face the way chohelet was?
Second thing: when God seems absent, maybe he is actually teaching you something. One of the paradoxes of the Christian faith- when he seems most distant is when he is most present.
You are not leaving God behind, you are leaving your thoughts of God behind.
Mother Teresa said no, she will not pray for clarity.
Clarity is the last thing you are holding onto and need to let go of.
Mother Teresa: "I've never had clarity, I've had trust."
Maybe he is teaching us to let go.
Third thing: hardest one to explain. It's a grand mystery. But it's a key to the Christian life. Our God is a suffering God. Jesus suffered for us so we don't have to, but that's only PART of it. It's something that he does WITH us, not just FOR us.
"I know what the Bible says I just don't always understand it"
God suffers with us. No matter what we are not alone.
We also suffer with him. It is how he meets us and how we meet him. Cohelet moments may be allowing you to connect with God is a way no other thing can.
Phil 3:10. Becoming like him in his death. It's a package deal. Can't have one without the other.
His life is a pattern for us.
Cohelet is not the problem child of the Bible. He is our hero. He is not broken, and neither are you. He doesn't need to be fixed. There is no quick fix. There is only walking with God daily, trusting, no matter what you feel like. You almost can't lose. 

Litany of Humility

A prayer that I need to remember daily.

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.

From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, Jesus.

That others may be loved more than I,Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I,Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be chosen and I set aside,Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be praised and I unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

-Rafael Cardinal Merry del Val

The song I have been subconsciously singing for the past few days...

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save
'Til on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the World by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

Who's Coming?!

I'm so excited to have Audio Adrenaline coming to our very own Wilkes-Barre, PA! October 3-- Invite your friends and tell them to invite theirs! This is going to be a night that you don't want to miss.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway. 

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

 If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.  Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway. 

The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.

In the end, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.

-Mother Teresa

Thoughts From Here to There...

I've been back in Philly now for two weeks, taking care of my little nieces Aurora and Brielle and baby nephew Levi as my sister-in-law Jen is getting ready to have baby number four... any day now! August came three days ago, so we are eagerly awaiting this little one's arrival at anytime. Last night from across the room I saw Jen's belly moving around as the baby hiccuped, making her whole little body move inside. the concept of growing humans inside our bodies never ceases to amaze me... a full-sized baby right there inside of her. It seems so normal and then when I think about it, it doesn't seem like it should be possible. 

As I spend these quieter days walking to the park with the kids, playing the backyard with chalk, swinging on the hammock, playing in the hose and buckets of water on hot days, watching Leap Frog and Curious George, changing diapers and washing clothes, making so many PB&J sandwiches, having dance parties to Taylor Swift's Trouble and Zac Brown Band's Jump Right In, picking up all the books and Legos before nap time, I am grateful for these days. They seem to last so long, but in reality they fly by, and I know I will miss them so much when I am back at the university. I literally love being with them so much that it never gets old. How blessed am I to do this as my job! My little nieces and nephs are really growing so quickly, and I want to appreciate each moment I have with them because who knows where time will take us! I seem to fit better in the baby world than the college-aged world anyway...but I love what I am studying and my I never take for granted my education! 

During these quieter days, my mind always wanders back to my life in Honduras and the many adventures I have been privileged to experience.

The two weeks that I just spent there flew by as I adventured around San Pedro and beyond with my friends. The first night after an awesome time at the Musical Garage seeing my dearly missed friends, we jumped in the back of Mauri's pickup truck and as the rain began to fall on us as we drove through the streets, I couldn't take the smile off my face. To be in the land that I haven fallen in love with... never am I happier. 

It was a great adventure to El Salv and Guatemala the first week, and a great second week in La Entrada de Copan, two hours outside the city, the beautiful location of Youth for Christ's camp. 

These past few weeks it has dawned on me what a different Honduras I know than that of everyone else I know in the US. What they know of Honduras, especially San Pedro, "the most dangerous place on earth" and "the murder capital of the world." Yes, the drug gang violence is horrible. Just for one stat, 79% of the cocaine transported from South America to the US goes through San Pedro. It's a huge transport location for drugs, and the violence this causes is beyond my comprehension. 

However, when I am there, I do not see the violence and danger. What I see are people passionate with hope for peace in their country. When I am there I feel the presence of God more than anywhere else, and I SEE Him working in the lives of those who love Him. I SEE Him changing lives as His love transforms them. I see hope like I don't see it anywhere else. I see Him in their faces. 

A missionary friend of mine who has served in Honduras for 20+ years posted this PBS news report a couple days ago.. again, this what people in the US see, this is the Honduras that they know. 

This video is graphic and VIEW DISCRETION IS ADVISED. 

It's hopelessly depressing to see this and focus on the darkness. That night after I watched this, I couldn't sleep and I was just praying.. I felt a spiritual attack come upon me and sadness began to overwhelm me, a deep hopelessness. I began to pray against the presence of the darkness in my life and for restoration in Honduras. When I focus on the pain I don't see the hope. But when I think about the JOY of living there, I remember that this is not the Honduras that I know. Everywhere I turn, I see Jesus. At the hospital where I used to work, when I am at the Musical Garage, at International Christian Fellowship, at my young adult's group at International Ministry Nido de Aguiles, with Youth for Christ, everywhere I am a part of people with a true passion for the glory of Jesus. And when there is true passion for Jesus, nothing more is needed. 

Every time I go back to visit, it's fun to see the new songs that my friends have added to their repertoire for the weekly Sesion de Alabanza (Worship Session). I was thrilled to see them add one of my favorites, Matt Redmond's We Are the Free. As I've mentioned before, I had the privilege of singing here with my friend Hector and the band when I while living there. It's always a joy to be back and see them faithful in worship, every single week. Going out and taking children and drug addicts off the streets and showing them a better way. This is the Honduras that I know. 

We are the free, the freedom generation

Singing of mercy

You are the One who set us all in motion

Yours is the glory

There’s a fire in our hearts and it burns for You

It’s never gonna fade away

We are the free, and Yours is the glory

Up from the grave He rose again

Up from the grave He rose and we will

Rise up, rise up

Into the world that You so love

Into the world we go and we will

Rise up, rise up

We are the free, the freedom generation
Singing of mercy
You are the One who set us all in motion
Yours is the glory

Maine to Philly to Honduras (and El Salv and Guate!)

It's been a week and two days now since I've been home from Maine, and it's been a chill time hanging out in hot and rainy Philly at Andrew and Jen's with them and their three littles Rora, Breezy, and Levi. 

Starting out my summer by going to Seminar by the Sea in Ocean Park, Maine was an incredible experience. I highly recommend this class (which is given through my school, Eastern University) to my college age friends! We had wonderful faculty and faculty assistants with whom I've created dear friendships. We had a variety of visiting faculty, and each class was filled with honest discussions, learning new concepts, and becoming aware. We also watched fascinating documentaries. Readings for class, writing responses, reflection papers, and our final project took up most of our time, but we as students had the chance to be together at the beautiful Oceanwood Camp, and spend time on the beach just a short walk down the street. It was also a great opportunity to be away from cell phones and the business of life and just be in creation and enjoy the world and people around me. This close-knit community created friendships that I will cherish for a long time. The best part about this class is that our faculty, Rebecca, Landi, Jen, and Xaris, cared not only about our academic progress, but about us as people. My hope to begin finding value in my own voice was fulfilled; it is clear to me that God lead me to this place and gave me these mentors at this time as I begin to walk in a new way. I am confident that He who began a good work in me will carry it to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Phil. 1:6). This experience was the best way I can imagine beginning my summer, and really the rest of my college years.

In just a few hours I will head to Honduras. I am so excited to go see my friends Ted, Susan, and Grace who are working with CURE, to spend time in worship with my dear friends at the Musical Garage, to be a part of ministry with Juventud Para Cristo (Youth for Christ), and to see my friends and missionary friends at my church, International Christian Fellowship, specifically Samaritan's Purse, Manos Unidos En Cristo, and Reach Out Orphanage Ministries! I'm grateful to know these people and to have the opportunity be once again be in this land that I love so much, that I miss calling "home."

One of my classmates and new friends from Seminar, Maggie, is currently in El Salvador, so once I get to Honduras I will jump on a bus and go see her and her friends for a few days, and we are also going to take a quick trip to Antigua, Guatemala, which I am SO excited for! Antigua was my first home away from home. I'm so excited to see all my Iglesia del Camino and YWAM friends!!! Plus my Spanish school and maybe even my teacher if she is still there. This little El Salv/ Antigua addition was super last minute  (within the last few days!) and I'm in complete awe as I see God work out these details. I didn't even try to make any of this work out; it all just fell into place! I cannot wait to be with friends and ministries that are so dear to me.

kings and queens

as i was sitting at andrew and jen's last night on the sofa with my dog, writing in a quiet house after three little happy babies went to bed, this song randomly came into my head. my favorite. random songs are always running through my head, and i'm usually humming it, and it's best when it's one i love. 

is this not the best?! 

it never gets old. i think that's always the way God's kingdom works.

i am continually humbled and in awe as i see the work that God is doing in Haiti and that my family has had the privilege to be a part of. i am so blessed to see my parents develop such amazing friendships and ministry partners in our friends such as ray and joan conn with the resatvek foundation, love a child orphanage, convoy of hope, and mark stuart and family with the hands and feet project. there are many many more than i can even name.

just after the semester ended and before i left for maine, i had the chance to be in nashville for show hope's 10th anniversary celebration! 

they had several amazing friends and musicians come and share, one being audio adrenaline who shared this favorite!

Sophomore?!

It's hard to believe that on Tuesday I finished my fifth final, bringing an end to my freshman year. It's incomprehensible to me how it seems so long ago that the year started, yet it went by in a flash. Each day dragging on, I counted down the days to each vacation we had, and now that we're done, it's bittersweet. I guess most of life happens that way. 

As I've said before, I'll say again, I'm grateful for Eastern to have the privilege of studying there. The friends I've made and professors I had have made this first part of the journey not only possible for me but so enjoyable. It's encouraging to look back and see how much I've grown over this year, and I look forward to the coming years. 

These three days since the semester has ended have been strange yet wonderful. Strange because I feel free as bird, studies no longer taking all my time and not living by the moment-by-moment mindset where my mind is focused on the next assignment due. Yet I don't quite know what to do with or particularly like having this free time because it's a mindset adjustment to enjoy it and not feel like I'm wasting time.

I've spent these past few days with my family in Philly, and we've kept quite busy. On Wednesday we went to the Franklin Institute with Sarah and her friend Bekah, and their combined 8 kids. My friend Claire came along. I think we had as much fun as the kids.

On Thursday we went to the Philly Zoo which was a great time. Again I think I love the animals as much as the kids! 

a fun bunch of the Block and Crosby kids with Ben Franklin

Hallie watching the bears at the zoo!

Little Will in the small animal exhibit           Will the monkey

with the porcupines            

It's been a great first few days of summer... I'm thankful to call both Philly and Bear Creek home at this time. I'm heading to Maine for the month of June for a summer course through Eastern. I have plans to go to Honduras for a couple of weeks in the beginning of July before I start nannying at Andrew and Jen's for the rest of summer before sophomore year quickly comes again.

Here is a (very long!) photoblog that captures just a few of the very many blessing in my life during my days as a freshman.

Fall semester I volunteered at a preschool for my Service Learning. What a time I had with these kids and how much I learned from them! 

Shane Claiborne came to speak the first Sunday of the academic year. It was a good word to start the year off. And we chatted about our mutual friend, the one and only Fred Smith!

spent Fall Free Days with these four sweet kids of mine (ok my sister's)

my friends continually amaze me with their talent.. Chinese character for "love"

thankful to have a job taking care of Mabel and her brother Gustav

also thankful to have a job taking care of Isla and her three brothers. She reminds me so much of my niece Hallie!

when my friends remind me that He is greater than I

when I need a break from school and just want to be home...I'm scrolling through facebook or twitter and see a picture that makes my day.. literally. Action shot of 8 kids on a sled?!?! My family rocks.

my super awesome bathroom floor cleaners! Everyone should use these.

Dad flew up from Sanibel with the girls for Aunt Chara's memorial service, and Abby stayed the night with me.

when my friend Pavy in Honduras sends me pics of the new puppies born to our dogs at the Juvintud Para Cristo camp in Copan.

                                      family weekend in NYC

Show Hope annual fundraiser in Nashville... good word from Francis Chan 

THANKSGIVING break. Sisters and Mom

Freh, one of my two algebra tutors first semester. Oh the fun times we had.

Celebrating Claire's birthday with Zoe just before the end of the first semester

 Jimi came to visit me!

Christmas Eve dinner... fun times with cousin Sarah. Gotta love the Oechsle side of the family!

Sanibel over the New Year! Unforgettable memories made with my sisters

My Honduran family...

and dear friends...

 visited them all between semesters

 Then went to Elizabeth's wedding in Nicaragua!

Springtime on our campus... 

 

 Went to Zoe's dance class with her one afternoon... a highlight of spring semester

Spring break in Sanibel with family and Claire and cousin Ben

After Eastern's first annual 5k race this spring, we had a color dance to raise money for Operation Net!

With my freshman roomie Abbie on her birthday after some RED MANGO :)

Easter weekend in Bear Creek! Sarah and Dan were so nice to have me and Hannah, Claire and Thanny

Some nights homework parties turn into sleepovers

 Cara... my fellow Latin culture loving friend.

Greg.. what can I say about this hero of mine and leader of Kids for the Kingdom

I have a record of visiting the Bridgemans once a semester. My North American  "Honduran" family who now live in Hershey. In the fall I got to see Jay and Pauline and the girls and reminisce about our days down south while eating sopa de frijoles and baleadas!

This time Grace came all the way from Honduras to see us! Her first time to PA.

 Jon made came out from Cali for our cousins retreat at Stoneleigh this spring. Always thankful when I get to see him.

One of the hardest parts of this year (and life) was losing our dear Rich. Margie and Andrew and Suz are heroes to me.

Rich and Suz made a trip to PA to visit their old home and friends three months earlier. It was a most precious time together

another sadness and very difficult part was losing Melinda, my friend Grace's Mom. Grace and her six siblings and father are faithfully continuing to serve and trust God.. every day they challenge, encourage and inspire me.

(See this tribute to her on her blog here)

Nearing the end...sometimes we feel dead after chem lab.. that's it.

Thankful for Anj and Jen who I will get to nanny for full time for the second half of summer when baby #4 comes! Here they are at the party in which they found out it's a girl!

ice pack for my wisdom teeth removal. Just in time before finals.

Emily and Shami come to the US!!!

sleepover with Emily and Claire

all care packages from Mom are great... but some are awesome! (like when they include matching t-shirts!)

Dr. Thomas walks into class one day with 14 stitches and black eye... he tried to catch a football while riding his road bike across a grassy, muddy field! He is the greatest psych professor for so many reasons.

when Dr. Acky wears his hat from the Republic of Georgia to class. I think he is the only reason I survived philosophy.

safety goggles and rubber gloves... last chem lab with my partners (beautifully photo bombed by the only two males in the entire lab)

MIDNIGHT breakfast the day before finals week starts

another reason Eastern rocks- they bring therapy dogs for students to de-stress  during the day before finals start. This is Darla the beautiful Bernese Mountain Dog.

thankful for my study buddies and fellow nursing major girls.

 jumping in the river after a run with Zoe.. it's what we do best.

Celebrating the last weekend at school at the Phillies game with Megan and Abbie!

Our boys lacrosse team won 22-6 in the championship! I've never watched lacrosse before until this year, and it comes in as a close second to soccer. 

flower garden a the house where I babysit 

first day of summer!

I share room with this little one when I'm in Philly, so mornings are always happy :)