The Past 6 [and 1/2] Months, Part 2

Probably the biggest thing during the past six months has been our wedding! Kennet and I got married on August 13th at the beach in Tela, Honduras, and it was such a HAPPY time. 

I did regret not having travel coordinator for guests, and I had to do my best to not let "situations" with my family affect me. It was also difficult for me to have my wedding in Honduras while living in Guatemala, and with sisters being in the US and Rwanda, they couldn't assist me with much. Thankfully, Kennet's family did SO much for me. They helped with ALL the decoration details. All of the decorations for the reception and the ceremony area were all thanks to Kennet's mom. She also helped me to have my dress tailored. In February of this year I went to the US for a family reunion and had one afternoon free to go and find a dress. I found a bridal store with an open appointment at that time and went with my mom, sister Emily, and sister-in-law. I tried on the three dresses that they had in the sort of style that I wanted and went with the one I liked the most. Definitely not how I imaged my bridal dress shopping would go, but since our engagement in August 2016 that was my only chance to get one in the US since I wouldn't be going  back again until long after the wedding. When I think about the little frustrations of the wedding, it is a good reminder to me that the purpose of the wedding was to just get married, and to have as many of our family and friends present as possible. That is what made it pure happiness! For me, the people are the most important memories, and at the end of the day the dress and flowers and decorations don't really have lasting value. 

Now, to people who have yet to plan a wedding, I will say this: if there is one or two things that are really important to you, focus on those things! For me, it was having the full-length video of our wedding, one where we could re-watch the ceremony and hear the words that were spoken. I, however, didn't clarify that with the photographer/ videographer, so now it is something that I will never have. 

But again, I'm thankful for the friends and family who were able to come and the beautiful time we had together. Despite inevitable frustrations, I can say that none of my many literal nightmares leading up to the wedding came true, and my one dream did come true: we are married now!

 w/ my dad and mom, 9 siblings, 3 in-laws, and 9 nieces and nephews

w/ Kennet's parents + 4 siblings

                          

Kennet surprised me with a wonderful and relaxing honeymoon cruise from Panama to Colombia, Curaçao, Bonaire, and Aruba. So much delicious food, time in the sun and the water, exploring new places, and meeting wonderful and helpful people. 

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Now we are two months married, but the wedding feels so long ago. What was my little house in San Juan is now our home, and we are learning how to live together and love each other unconditionally. 

Kennet and I get to work together a lot as he works part-time with the Casa; I love that and hope we are work and ministry partners for life. He always remains involved with other ministries (mostly Haiti and Honduras) and his business from a distance, and occasionally locally here with the youth from the church and with mission teams from our sponsor church in PA, Christ Wesleyan. 

This month we have submitted my application for me to be a Honduran resident (yay!) so I won't have to leave the CA-4 (Guatemala, Honduras, Nicaragua, El Salvador) every 90 days. 

We've also submitted the preliminary paperwork for Kennet's green card, so within the next year and half we should be able to go to the US together! At this moment of my life, nothing excites me more. We just might have a WHITE Christmas next year! 

I also want to go to graduate school to get my master's degree in Midwifery which will be for two years. This is the main reason we want Kennet to be able to have the green card, other than being able to visit our friends and family.

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As I've mentioned many a time, the work with the Casa over the past year has been fulfilling and I've been learning so much along the way (and it has confirmed my desire to study further). Moreover, after a year of dating long-distance while I was in my last year of nursing school, and then part-time long distance during our year of engagement, nothing feels happier for me than to be married to and be able to live with, be with, travel with (most times), my now husband (how long does it take for that word to start sounding normal after one gets married? I rarely use the term 'my husband' because it makes me feel very old!).

Even with this contentment with the great things that we've accomplished with the Casa and of being together, it hasn't been without its difficulties. For one, I feel as though I have done my job of helping the Casa get up and running smoothly. At times I feel very anxious and ready to be able to do more, and I am aware that what is next is studying for the specialty. 
Furthermore, this region of Lake Atitlan is remote and it can be difficult to be far from 'civilization' (grocery stores, home goods stores, clothing stores, advanced mechanic shops, airport). There are those frustrations which are still livable (stocking up on 2-3 months worth of non-perishable food when visiting the city, having to stay 1-2 nights in a hotel in the city while the truck is being repaired, having to leave the day before a flight is to depart, frequently having the electricity and water shut off (and unreliable hot water), not having a dryer, having a half-functioning stove, not having cell service to be able to call family/ people in the US, not easily being able to receive mail), but the most difficult thing for me is not having friends or a community at all. Thankfully Kennet and I are homebodies, can read or watch TV series for hours, and love to be together 99% of the time without getting tired of only having each other. For most people I know, they wouldn't stand this lifestyle. And there are those times I admit that I also feel Iike I cannot! 

I've never been one to get homesick until living here. I expected to feel completely at home, like I could live here forever, the way that I felt when I was in both Antigua and SPS, Honduras. But I've found that I long to be able to stop by and see Kennet's family at anytime, spend time with my sisters, with my friends from nursing school, my nieces and nephews, to have a church community that Kennet and I can connect with. Even though we have each other, on many days I feel that we are so far away from everyone we love... it can be quite lonely. Yet my desires are conflicting, because I don't desire to live in the US at all and I know since a I was young girl that I would live as a missionary.

In my years of singleness, I always daydreamed that as a newlywed I was have a cute little house (which we do), and invite people over for movies, guitar-playing, coffee, baking, to have a space where anyone could come and just be (so many people have done that for me over the years). I have my bookshelves full, anticipating that I would lend books to many a friend. Yet I have found here that I don't want people to come to my house or see my belongings. Being surrounded by this general lack of monetary wealth causes our neighbors to see us more as a bank than a friend. We are frequently asked to loan money, help pay school fees, help get a family member out of jail, etcetera, and that plays a part in the loneliness.

I am thankful that I have married an eternal optimist (we balance each other!) and that together we are learning to take life one season at a time, one day a time, taking full advantage of being a blessing to and being blessed by the people we are with. We are here at this time for a purpose. We don't want to waste any chapters of our lives.

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In my many quiet mornings/ afternoons/ nights (depending on the day) I've been enjoying being a part of a 'book club' with my sisters, as well as listening to a variety of podcasts. For now I'll end this post with my current #1 podcast: Head to Heart by Christa and Lucas Gifford. Other than the book Boundaries, any other book or podcast I had ever read/listened to (in the spiritual/ self-help category) went out the window. The podcast led me to purchase her (Christa Black Gifford) book, Heart Made Whole, which has led me to take her 6-week class based on the book. This process of inner healing through the power of the Holy Spirit, learning how to love myself and be a loving wife is just that- a process! In learning all of this while living far from loved ones, Christa's materials have come to me in the most timely manner. Stay tuned for more!